So Give Me Something To Believe

Still no word back from the boy. It's hardly been a day and a half, but I still want the letter to be ash. It's to the point of making me sick to my stomach. When I think about it. Which is pretty much always.
I realized today that even though I am on Spring Break, I should prolly actually work on school stuff. I was trying my damnest to ignore it, but really? I don't want to be uber stressed out in two weeks when I am overwhelmed with midterms and papers and homeworks. Yuck! So I seriously need to finish up the homework that was due last Friday that my teacher decided to give us the break to finish up. And? 15 page paper comes to mind. And seeing as how I completely skipped over the undergrad Astrophysics class (it was cancelled, so I went straight into the grad level Astrophysics course), I have a lot of research to do on my topic (X-Ray Binary Formation and Evolution) before I can even do the research. Since I have zero background on the subject except a nice picture in my brain of a star swirling around a black hole which is gobbling up the star's mass (pretty picture, actually... but I can't write 15 pages on how much I think the picture is pretty, right?), I need to actually LEARN about X-Ray Binary Systems before I can delve right into reading 5 recent physics journal arcticles on the topic (not the easiest of tasks, if you've ever tried to read a physics journal article on a topic you know nothing about...). And then come up with 15 pages to write about! Wooooo! And a smidgen of hoo to boot.
So that's where I've been all semester. Learning about stuff so I can learn about stuff. I guess that's what Grad school is all about? I dunno. I'm not even sure anymore that I want to even do Astrophysics. It's pretty hard! But then what? I kinda like Quantum. I hear there's a Quantum Astrophysics field that is up and coming... I'll have to look into that. After the paper is done, of course. Providing I ever even start it. Teehee. Such the procrastinator, I am.