Once upon a time I knew What I wanted from this life.
There was you... waltzing in and out of my life
Until butting into my dance.
Not that I truly minded -
Playing your games was the only prerequisite.
Maybe I didn't play them long enough...
Every facet of your being
Was all I wanted to see.
Yet the more I played along,
The further you drifted from me...
Hiding behind a plethora of vocabulary words
And metaphors of song.
Now I wonder who you really are
And what you really wanted from me.
Boys smell nice.
It stains my clothes.
So night sweats masquerade as you,
So quiet and still next to me.
Did you discover sleep, I wonder -
Is that what's taken you from me?
I wonder if you even see
What you're doing and what it truly does to me.
This pipe I smoke to make it stop.
To make the pain you gave me turn to thoughts.
I want to sleep, but in your dreams
You've lost all hopes and faiths in me.
So when I'm gone you'll think no less,
Since life goes on in happiness.
But where will I end up in this,
When everything returns to bliss?
I know where you live now,
I've tasted it.