Free Bird

We have an audit today. I guess we're trying to get re-certified by ICBO, the bigwigs. If we do, then we look good and will get more work. But that means I have to know what I am doing. And I have to care. Neither of which is true at the moment. Well, I wouldn't say that I don't know what I'm doing. Because I do. I just don't know that what I know is what they are looking for, and I have to perform a test in front of them for the audit. Woo, fun! Shouldn't be too bad. Aside from the caring part.
I'm switching departments. As soon as possible. Our camera went missing, and my boss would like to blame the fact that he thinks it got stolen on me. I'm so over it. Here's what happened:
I needed a camera for a special job I was doing for a client. Our old camera is broken (or, this was my understanding anyways), so I asked my boss to use the new camera. He went to his office, got it for me, and handed it directly to me. I then proceeded to do my work as normal, and when I was done, I went to give him back the camera. He was in our new office, moving things around and such, so I held it up and said, "here's the camera, can you download the pictures for me when you have a chance? I'll leave it right here." And put it down. Out of my hands, right? Apparently not. Because when I returned on Thursday (after the fourth of July holiday), the pictures had not yet been downloaded, so I couldn't finish the report. When my boss called me to say he was running late, I reminded him about the pictures and he said the camera was where I left it and he'd do it when he got in. So I went in to do it myself, and no camera. In it's place was our laptop, however. But no camera. When my boss came in, I said I couldn't find it, so he looked all over for it. Couldn't find it. Therefore, he assumes it was stolen. And he says it was MY fault. What the eff, man?!?!? He first says that I shouldn't have been using the new camera in the first place, that he only got it for close up pictures and such (our old camera didn't take good pics of close up things, which we often need). So I'm supposed to use the old camera, which he told me was broken? Then why didn't he say that BEFORE giving me the new one? It's not like I just went in there and took it from his office or something... he brought it to me! So I say, it's not my fault, you can't blame me. And he says that yes, he can. He says I know how absent minded he can be, so I shouldn't have just left it any-old-where because I should have known he would forget about it. I'm sorry, was that in my job spec? To keep track of his things? He acknowledged me when I said I was leaving it there, and never said anything about me needed to put it back away in his office or something. But since I did not take into account his absent-mindedness, it's now my fault that the camera "got stolen" (I still think he misplaced it when he moved the laptop). Mind you, this whole conversation took place over the phone and consisted of me in near tears while my boss is practically screaming these things at me with curse words thrown in to boot.
So he was on his way out of town. And I was on my way out the door. The next day, he wasn't in, so I talked to the big boss and requested a transfer to another department. He said that was fine, he wasn't suprised. Now it's the following week, we're buried in an external ICBO audit to get us re-certified. I do not want to help this guy out in the least, but it's my job so whatever. I haven't mentioned to him what me and the big boss discussed, so I have no idea where we stand in terms of that nonsense. I don't know if big-boss told him already or what. We've all been so busy with this audit, no one's had time to think or worry about much else.
All I wanted was a freakin' apology for him blaming me. But instead I got a lot of yelling. I do not deserve that sort of treatment. No one deserves that sort of treatment. And I won't stand for it anymore. This is not the first time my boss and I have butted heads over his inability to take responsibility for some of his own actions, too.
And I'm done with the vent. Phew!